Tips for Thought

The Reality of Pain and How to Deal with It

Life is full of surprises—including painful and unfortunate ones. This is where grief comes in. The good news is, time heals everything and it starts with you.

There is no timeline when it comes to moving on. However, the hard truth is that one day, you have to. Doing so can help you be anchored back to the present and slowly have the will to be hopeful about the future. Pain that stays stagnant can hinder you from doing great things. Life will always come with grief, but you can always heal and start over. Here are a few ways that you can deal with pain.

Take time to sit with your feelings

When you are faced with heaving and negative emotions such as pain, you have the tendency to shut down and find ways to cope with what happened. Although some are able to cope in a healthy way, there are a lot of times when coping mechanisms are unhealthy such as drinking alcohol or depriving oneself of basic needs. One helpful way to deal with grief is to find a safe and quiet place to feel and absorb your feelings—this way, you can slowly move forward.

Replace sad memories with happy ones

Let’s say a certain place or object triggers your grief. As humans, it is only normal to associate things or places with feelings. In order to move forward and deal with pain, it is a great idea to face that place, use that object, and replace the painful memories with happy ones. This way, the painful memory would seem like a distant event when you look back a few years from now.

Find new hobbies or interests

Is there something you’ve wanted to do for a long time? How about something you’ve been curious about the moment you saw or heard about it? One way to deal with grief is to do new things as a way to move forward or enter into rebirth. Doing so doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll leave everything behind; it simply means that you’re starting a new chapter now.

Commit to practicing acceptance

While there are things that can be fixed, some aspects of your life will never be the same after grief and pain. This is where acceptance comes in. In practicing acceptance, you have to remind yourself that some things are out of your control, and there are greater things beyond the painful past or present you have now. Self-blame or self-sabotage has no space in the journey toward healing, so make sure that you always extend grace to yourself and others. Although acceptance takes time, it will always be worth it.